Lawrence Taylor - Making Ben Roethlisberger Look Good Since 2010

Lawrence Taylor - Making Ben Roethlisberger Look Good Since 2010

No, that’s not a photo of Lawrence Taylor with the underage prostitute he’s accused of raping. This is a depiction of a different kind of abuse – subjecting viewers to terrible television.

Lawrence Taylor will apparently be the latest NFL player in the news for the wrong reasons – not a first for the famous crack-cocaine enthusiast and jangly earring wearer. Honestly, those big diamond encrusted “LT” earrings always screamed “crack smoking rapist” to me.

Lawrence Taylor’s wife is claiming that it’s all a conspiracy. This is very likely as Lawrence Taylor has made many enemies over the years – enemies as varied as the Stasi, the Illuminati, PETA and the People’s Liberation Front of Lemuria, a Luddite eco-terrorist group. Eager to tarnish Taylor’s image and stop him from bringing their Machiavellian schemes to a halt, they without doubt set Taylor up.

This dollar, found in Taylor's wallet, shows that he was close to figuring out the Illuminati's secrets.

This dollar, found in Taylor's wallet, shows that he was close to figuring out the Illuminati's secrets.

Ben Roethlisberger, when told the details of today’s Lawrence Taylor arrest, was quoted as saying “lol wut?”

   

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